Monday, 28 February 2011

Riders - Missing (Chapter 3 - The second Visit) cont 3...

I am confused and worried, and this is not a good combination.  The reason I started my writing blog was to give myself a kick up the rear, stop procrastinating and to start doing something I have wanted to do for a very long time.  But today I have read an article in Writers and Artists on “when do you show your work in the revision process?”  The gist of the article is – don’t show your work to anyone else when they are likely to come up with a list of suggestions that you are already half considering.  Also, if their comments are going to make you say things like “yes, I thought that”, or “well this is only a rough draft”, or “I already know that needs changing”, don’t show them!  The article goes on to say that the reader you have given your work to, starts to wonder why you are asking their opinion when you already know it.  Now I am in a dilemma.  Do I continue on my route of posting my “rough draft” on my blog or not?
Having said that I have finished the last “rough draft” of Chapter 3 and posted it up for you all to read.  At this stage I am not sure if further Chapters will be posted yet?

The four continued there meal chatting about love and the never ending stream of young ladies in Khaos’s life.  TJ jokingly asking Khaos for advice on how to win the ladies and Khaos talked lovingly about his five children.  He confided in the fact that Kay, his eldest at sixteen, seemed to be continuously embarrassed about him and refused to let him take her to school.  His noisy, smoky motorbike was not acceptable transport for a popular girl.  The others still adored going on rides on the back of his motorbike, except of course Sasha who was still too young.  Thanatos laughed and told him that Sasha had him wrapped around her little finger, something Khaos did not deny.
After the hearty meal of oxtail stew, crusty rolls and apple crumble for pudding TJ offered to clear the dishes and load the dishwasher before going upstairs to his room to play on his Wii game.
Thanatos refilled their wine glasses and carried them through to the living room and sat down next to his wife with a deep sigh.
‘Now,’ cajoled Khaos. ‘we don’t have any eavesdropping ears, interfering wife stealing men or impressionable youngsters around, what is bothering you Thane?’
‘Yes, my sweet,’ said Melanie taking a sip from her wine. ‘I have noticed that you have not told me about your day today?  What is wrong?’
That was one of the strengths of their marriage is that they shared everything with each other.  Neither would be too tired after a day at work to share what had happened, who they had seen or any other matters that might have occurred.
Closing his eyes he slowly recaptured what had happened today in his head before looking at them and stating, ‘I was seen.’
‘You were seen?’ said Khaos a little puzzled.
‘Yes, I was at the hospital, standing next to the man’s bed in the ICU and I was seen,’ confirmed Thanatos.
Both Khaos and Melanie looked at him confused.  Why was this sighting bothering him so much, it was to be expected.
‘But, the man was dying,’ consoled Melanie. ‘He would have to see you.’
‘No,’ said Thanatos shaking his head. ‘Not the man, the girl!’
‘You just said that you were standing next to the man in the bed,’ puzzled Khaos. ‘Was there another bed nearby?’
‘No,’ replied Thanatos quietly. ‘The girl walked in and saw me.’
Khaos and Melanie looked at each other and both asked at the same time. ‘Was she on the list.’
‘No,’ said Thanatos. ‘That is the problem.’
‘Are you sure she saw you, Thane?’ hurried Khaos.  ‘Perhaps she was stressed and merely staring into space.’
‘She spoke to me,’ said Thanatos quietly again.
There was silence.  All three trying to formulate what had happened in their minds.
Khaos queried, ‘Did you check the list.’
‘Twice,’ answered Thanatos.
‘What did she say,’ asked Melanie taking her husbands hand into hers and rubbing gentle.
‘She asked what I was doing and if I knew her father,’ answered Thanatos.
‘Maybe the clerks have messed up again,’ said Khaos trying to find a solution.  ‘You are always saying that they are inept and I often get strange messages on my blackberry.’
‘The list is not the same as your blackberry, Khaos,’ confirmed Thanatos.  ‘The clerks do not have access to that.  The orders come direct from the top.  That is the one reason why I continue with the traditional way – no mix ups or mistakes.’
Biting his lip in thought he quickly got up, went into the kitchen to retrieve his coat that he had thrown over the kitchen chair.  He carried his coat into the living room, sat and pulled out the scroll.  Slowly opening it again he looked at the list, it had not changed.  Shaking his head for the others, he rolled it up again and replaced it into the inside pocket of his coat.
‘Still not on the list,’ he mumbled. ‘The date and time has also changed for the man.’
‘Changed?’ queried Mel.  ‘That doesn’t happen, does it?’
‘No.’  answered Thanatos slowly.  ‘This is the first.’
‘Are you sure?’ queried Khaos softly.
Thanatos’ eyes narrowed and he glared at his friend across the room.  His dark blue eyes turned black, his skin paler and his lips narrowed.  ‘I am not mistaken,’ he said through clenched teeth.
‘I’m sorry,’ rushed Khaos, ‘just trying to think of all possibilities.’
‘Perhaps she is Muse, like me,’ suggested Melanie quietly. ‘I have always been convinced there are many that have not been registered with the Brotherhood.’
‘No, she is not a Muse of any Other,’ said Thanatos.  ‘She does not have the aura.’
The three sat in thoughtful silence, trying to come up with a logical conclusion, but none was forthcoming.
‘Right,’ said Khaos suddenly downing his wine and standing up. ‘Let's go.’
‘Go where?’ asked Thanatos and Melanie together.
‘To the hospital,’ replied Khaos, ‘where else?’
‘I don’t see what going to the hospital is going to prove,’ said Thanatos wearily.
‘If ..’ Khaos stopped looking wearily at Thanatos, ‘when she sees us again we can ask her who she is. You game?’
‘Alright,’ said Thanatos slowly his stomach tightening into a nervous knot. ‘We can try that.  Oh, but I have put Mortis to rest.’
‘No problem,’ laughed Khaos. ‘We can take the bike.’
‘Hmm,’ mumbled Thanatos unenthusiastically, standing slowly and putting his untouched wine on the table.  He kissed his wife quickly and said, ‘we won’t be late.’
Melanie carried the wine glasses into the kitchen and watched the two men walk out to the bike.  In the shadows they looked like Laurel and Hardy, the best of friends but complete opposites.
The roar of the motor bike made her flinch and hope that Mr Smithers didn’t decide to pay another concerned visit.

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